fml.

sooo last night i went to bed at 10:30ish .. & need i say how FABULOUS it felt .

well tonight the situation is soooo not the same :( why cant i just sleeeeeeeeeeep?

maybe its because i need someone in bed with lil ole me to make me feel safe ?? hmm.

idk .

ohhhhhhhh but on a diff note people .. that pic above ^^^.. ya that one . freaking cool huh ?? i have this super weird obsession with graveyards. i think they are beautiful .. weird iknow. i want a photo shoot in one ... i know personally that sometimes the very people who can look

the MOST alive can be the ones who can feel like most lifeless . so the photoshoot would be like the dead soul meets the dead spirit .. maaaaaaybeeee . idk.. im creepy like thatttt !

anywho. i need to take my ass to bed. i need a vacation. maybe to ... idk lets say , cali ? hm. we shall see.

opening act

soo, i am a thinker. i am also a dreamer, a hard headed person, a fighter, a quiter, a lover & a fighter. point is, i am many things. i have come to realize that its hard trying to figure out WHO exactly i am. somedays i think i know what i want in life, other days i wonder "what in the hell was i thinking ???"

i have come to terms with a lot of things in 2010. its been a huge year for me & when i say "ME" i still wonder " who is ME"? like who am i ?? am i a 20yr old who wants to be independent to my core? somedays im all " i don't need a guy to be happy " but then reality hits and im not the hardass that i am in my mind and i realize just how lonely i am

truth be told, i think i am a person who can be completely emotionLESS @ all the wrong times & i hate myself for that sometimes. its like even in the saddest situations , i can distance myself from it & not even shed a tear, or think twice about it & i am pretty sure that cant be normal. but hey , what is normal anyway ???? im pretty sure that this post only makes sense in my twisted little head. but thats ok by me.

xoxo- blair